Sharing the message

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I hope everyone wore their pink shirts today! I know I did and I hope that many of you did too.

I have been very lucky with this blog to be able to share something I belive in, and the response from readers has always been overwhelming to me. As I have said before I would love to be able to write more.

This is my last semester as a non-traditional adult student. I am about to graduate from college, May 14th, 2011, almost twenty years (just shy by three weeks) from the day I graduated high school.

As much as love writing this blog, and writing in general (I’d love to find someone who would pay me to do it :)), school is something I just cannot put aside. My experience in school as a child was miserable. From “kick me” signs, to fake friendships, to name calling, to spitting at me, to physical abuse, to stealing homework and more. School was a nightmare. Well not school itself, I loved learning, but the social experience was more than I could really stand and my grades suffered. Plus, it was no fun to be smarter, or have the right answer all the time. So I didn’t and I couldn’t wait for the day I graduated high school. I swore I was never going back. Besides, no one had told me I deserved to go to school.

But here I am, graduating. With honors and a 3.72 GPA, which I think is pretty good. This semester I am writing a thesis, and I hope to get accepted to a Master’s Program in Geographic Information Technology. That is what I am spending my time on, (and a little political unrest in our state), and as much as I do love writing I haven’t been able to devote the time it deserves.

That is why I was so surprised when I was invited to be part of a new site about to be launched called Paperblog. I checked it out and it seems like it will be a great site, so added my blog, and my membership to the Paperblog site has been confirmed by the Communications Manager. We will see how it all works out and as soon as it launches I will let all of you know. It promises to be a great site where information can be found all in one place.  Now if only I could get someone to pay me to write.  Oh well, for now I will write when I can and I’ll  stick to what I am good at, studying.  

In the mean time please remember that a bullied child may not be enjoying school, they may be able to get better grades, and they may just wish someone would notice the pain they are living with. It will get better, I promise, but I am sure they don’t realize that right now.

Have a great day!

Kindergarten Open House

Image via Wikipedia

 

It is scary meeting new teachers, seeing the school, and learning where everything is. Scary, not only, for my very brave almost six-year-old but scary for me. She seems to have it well in hand, even if she is a little shy about it. And not actually shy, she is more a watcher. She watches to see where everything goes, how everyone interacts, and what is required of her, before she jumps in. Understandable.  

Nope ,she is not the one who is nervous, really. It is me. I am a little scared of the other parents. Maybe, it is because I have read Queen Bee Moms and King Pin Dads, Rosalind Wiseman. Maybe, I am nervous because of what I went through in kindergarten, and I am nervous for her.  Maybe I am nervous because people really scare me. 

You wouldn’t guess it, and no one usually does, but people, pretty much terrify me. Mostly, because I know how mean and petty they are, passing judgements, sizing up clothes and appearance, determining a persons worth through their attire.  I never let on though, not at first. I talk to everyone, and I mean everyone. I have been accused of being overly social and overly friendly.  Maybe that is true. But the truth is, that I just really want to meet people, and enjoy their differences, even if I am terrified they will not respond in kind. Plus, the truth is I just don’t know how to act around people, and I get scared, and my mouth seems to go on hyper-drive. People probably hate it. It doesn’t mean I am any less genuine, it just means I don’t really know what to say, and all I want to do is know everyone!  

My daughter didn’t seem terrified. Her teacher is kind, and she already knows a lot of kids at the school, because of the wonderful community we live in, and her preschool experiences.  Kids kept saying “Hi” and waving, “good to see you”, so she didn’t seem worried. If she was she didn’t show it and she didn’t mention it when we talked about her impression of the new school.  

Instead, I was worried. Worried about how her experience will be, and worried about my experience with other parents.  Kindergarten Open House is stressful, I think.    

 Today we have a short conference with her teacher, to learn a little more about her time in class. She is excited and can’t wait for the first day. The conference is just prolonging her anticipation.  

For me, it means she gets two more days to be a little girl.  And I don’t have to worry about my experience as a parent for awhile.  

Bullying starts in 4-K?

I begin this blog as an experiment, of sorts. My daughter is attends a 4-K program in our town. The program is affiliated with the public schools but it is new so her class is actually held at a Lutheran school in town.  Yes, you heard me, a public school class in a Lutheran School.I thought it was odd too.  There are a lot of youth who attend the new program and the public school did not have space for the classes yet.  There are classes held in the Lutheran school, and some day care facilities and they use public school curriculum.  (except of course for the voluntary five minutes after school each day for religion in my daughter’s class)

The biggest irony is the Lutheran school is actually leasing space from the public school system in an Elementary school the district decided to shut down. I know it’s hard to follow, Public school class, in a Lutheran school, held in a former public school, leased from the Public School???  Bizarre.

The 4-K program is in its 2nd year and one would think that the district will eventually consider moving these classes to an actual public school at some point, but I suppose it works fine for now.

My daughter is slightly older than a lot of her classmates as she has one of those ‘late’ birthday’s and missed the cut off date for Kindergarten this year.  We didn’t mind that she would be delayed for Kindergarten by a year because it gave her an extra year to be a kid. An extra year before she would have to start college and an extra year before she would have to join the “real world” someday.

She seems to do just fine socially but I am always concerned because we didn’t put her in child care. We made extra effort to socialize her at all ages with play groups and we have a lot of neighbors with little children around our house, so she has always interacted well with others.

A few weeks ago she came home and mentioned she ‘made friends with” a girl in her class who I suspected may not have had a lot of friends. She seemed quiet and shy and didn’t interact a lot when I visited the classroom.

I was excited and happy because in our home, we discuss being friends with all types of people and not practicing exclusion.  My husband/partner and I were very proud. I told our daughter she should invite the girl for a playdate.

A few days ago our daughter came home and said she made a new friend. One that would not let her play with this other girl. One that played keep away in gym class and wouldn’t let anyone hold the girl’s hand.

Of course I was horrified, and we talked with our daughter about how that made the girl feel.

My question is this. Our daughter is 5 years old in 4-K and is already experiencing bullying on some level.  What have you experienced? Does it shock you as much as it does me or is it just ‘normal’?